Does your profile sound like someone who likes to have a good time? “I’ve tried online dating before and it didn’t work, but I’m trying it again.” Or “I’ve had a lot of challenges and hardships over the last 20 years and now I’m ready for a change.” Or “I’ve devoted my life to my children and caring for my elderly parents…now it’s my turn.” Again, this all may be true, but it’s important to let your prospective match know that spending time with you will be enjoyable…otherwise why would they want to contact you?When was the last time you read a man’s profile and thought “Wow, he sounds like he really needs me to cheer him up…I definitely want to meet him!Once you’ve hit your 40s and beyond, you kind of know what works for you and what doesn’t. If you do a good job describing yourself and painting a picture of what it feels like to be in a relationship with you, it will attract the right men and repel the wrong ones.Many women use their profile as a list of their likes and dislikes. So focus more on what you have to offer, and less on what they can do for you.After all, you’ve probably accomplished a lot in your life without a man and are prepared to continue doing so.Be careful not to sound like there is no room in your life for a relationship.It’s too generic, common and, frankly says nothing about you that’s interesting.Instead, be more specific and paint a picture for him.
The man reads this as you having incredibly high expectations and reliance on your relationship for your happiness. If you wouldn’t say it on your first date, don’t write it in your profile. Women in their 40s, 50s and beyond are particularly guilty of this.
Then, do your research; think about what you are looking for, and find out how to attract that kind of person.
You'll want to write a profile that represents you and what you're looking for.
Such as, “A great evening for me is trying out the newest ethnic food restaurant with a few good friends and disagreeing about the controversial exhibit at the art museum.” Or, “Sunday mornings you’ll find me at the SPCA walking dogs and then off to my favorite breakfast joint for their fresh brewed coffee and chile relleno.
I like mine extra spicy.” (Okay, doesn’t hurt to flirt a little.) 5) You sound like a Debbie Downer.
As a Dating and Relationship Coach for Women over 40, I’ve seen (and done) it all when it comes to online dating.