I dated a lot before I had my daughter, and this was one of the most uncomplicated relationships I’d ever had. We ended up going out a few more times before things fizzled out.
Lots of chemistry doesn’t always make for a long-term thing.
When I lived in New York City, I tried Tinder briefly but didn’t feel it was the right fit for me.
However, I was willing to try the dating app again.
And here’s the thing: I was most nervous about how to talk about sex and breastfeeding with a new guy I wanted to sleep with. Another thing is, I can’t be feeling all insecure about leaking milk.
He would have to just deal with that if it happened and not say anything.
One offered me a ride back to the campus (I didn't own a car then) one night after choir rehearsal since it was raining and my campus was about 4 miles away.
We sat in her car waiting for the rain to let up some (her suggestion) and while we talked, she kept putting her hand on my leg.
If nothing else, it would just be funny to see if there was anyone I knew. One guy, I’ll call him “Jim,” was attractive, a few years older than me, and had never been married before.
Again, we chatted a long time until finally I asked him out. When I lived in New York, guys never hesitated to ask me out.
I never had to make the first move, so this was new, but I didn’t mind.
When we were in his car, he just planted one on me and we made out. I knew right then and there that I wanted more, and I told him as much. Something I didn’t mention in my profile, however, is that I’m still breastfeeding. This isn’t a big deal for a new mom who’s washing her hands all the time anyway to protect her newborn, but my date, who would probably try to get a little handsy, would need to be informed and perhaps reminded. I’m not going to sit here and speculate about what other people do in bed, but for me, that would just be too weird.
For one thing, I am definitely not interested in somebody who wants to date me I’m breastfeeding. I also knew that it wasn’t going to be an issue until I was ready to be physically intimate with somebody. My baby’s mouth is the only one that belongs there right now.
Finally, he would have to be gentle with my breasts, end of story. Not exactly pillow talk, but to my surprise this sweet, southern man — a man with a concealed carry gun license and a tackle box on the backseat — was completely fine with all of it. Turns out, his mom had breastfed him and all six of his siblings. It’s the healthiest.” It was my turn to be shocked. Without getting into any juicy details, I’ll just say that I definitely enjoyed myself.