When a kid is in an online candy store of pretty potential partners, how can he be expected to choose just one?
Philia dictates a type of love that forces a choice, and that asks us to be steadfast in our allegiance. Agape is perhaps the most difficult of all loves, and I believe it is the most important in a lasting relationship.
And maybe it's a stodgy old person thing to "blame the internet" for society's ills (I write as a drink my Metamucil and Maker's).
In all seriousness, I realize online dating wasn't the genesis of this myopic conception of love, but it has reinforced it to a tremendous degree.
And two out of the three men continued -- to my surprise -- to communicate romantically with women on those dating sites well into our relationships.
Usually in the same browsing sessions that they were checking out porn. While porn can have a place in healthy romantic relationships, in this context, it offers a release that you haven't had to work for, which is nothing like a real relationship.
Let's lay off the desperate questing and consider this: there are probably hundreds, maybe thousands, of people in the world with whom we could be happy.
), coping with children who run away from home or become addicts, losing all their savings in the stock market.
Less dramatically, agape is the love that prevents you from leaving your partner when he or she is no longer shiny and new.
Instead of looking ahead to technology for remedying our emotional needs, we could afford to looking back to the ancient Greeks.
They had four primary words for love: storge, eros, philia, and agape, and thus, a broader conception of what we call "love." Storge is the least pertinent to us here -- it is a natural affection, and most often used in Greek texts in a familial sense. It's lusty love, it's "butterflies" love -- the easiest kind of love.
The "soulmate" is an illusion, and that's good news.